Archbishop: I don’t pray for my daughter’s disability

Image caption Katharine, Ellie and the Most Reverend Justin Welby

The Church needs to do more to embrace disability and mental health, the Archbishop of Canterbury Justin Welby says, drawing on the experience of two of his daughters.

Justin – he insists we use his first name – reveals that Katharine’s mental health difficulties and Ellie’s learning disabilities, had “really brought it to the front of [his] mind”.

He was speaking to the BBC Ouch podcast, made by the BBC’s disability team.

Sitting beside his daughters, Ellie, 24, and Katharine, 32, Justin encourages them to speak openly, even if it is difficult for him to hear.

He begins by taking Ellie’s hand – this is the first time she has spoken publicly.

Taking part in a discussion about exclusion with other disabled studio guests, Ellie says: “The church I go to now, I sit at the back because I don’t really feel comfortable.

“They’re very friendly in my church, but sometimes I can feel a bit out of place there.”

Ellie also has dyspraxia, which impacts co-ordination, but can be confused with clumsiness.

Her disability, not being an obvious physical impairment, is often referred to as invisible. Because of this, she feels her needs are often misunderstood or overlooked.

“I have struggled a lot. People have looked at me and basically – I know the look now – it’s literally like, ‘You’re not disabled, why are you sitting there?’ Or, ‘Why can’t you do this?’.

“I’ve been discriminated against quite a few times because they don’t understand it.”

Justin gives Ellie – who confesses she is a “Daddy’s girl” – a friendly punch on the shoulder to acknowledge that she’s made a good point.

He, himself, has struggled at times with what he calls “the black dog” – a phrase Winston Churchill used to describe episodes of depression.

In 1983, the Welbys lost a seven-month-old baby, Johanna, in a car crash. Twelve months later another of his children was critically ill. It has often led him to question his faith.

“There have been moments where it’s been a huge test,” he says. “You read the Bible and life’s not simple.”

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Media captionArchbishop of Canterbury talks with daughters on disability and mental health
  • Does the Archbishop prefer listening to S Club 7 or the Backstreet Boys?
  • Also on the show: Co-writer of The Vicar of Dibley and Spitting Image, Paul Mayhew-Archer, talks about living with Parkinson’s
  • 10-year-old Frasier talks about the book he has published about the refugee crisis
  • For more Disability News, follow BBC Ouch on Twitter and Facebook, and subscribe to the weekly podcast.

Religion hasn’t always been so important to him.

At boarding school he used chapel time to finish homework, hidden behind the hymn books. The only interesting thing that ever happened, he says, was the “headmaster falling out of the pulpit”.

It was years later, when he worked in Kenya as an oil investor, that he met people with a great connection to God. It was the first step on the path to being ordained in 1989.

Katharine has spoken openly about her mental health struggle, suicidal thoughts, and of not being able to confide in her parents about them.

She says the Church does not always know how to respond to these struggles.

She says people offer to pray for her, but feels this masks important conversations and opportunities to help.

“If your first response is, ‘Can I pray for your healing?’, then you’re not listening,” she says.

“Because actually – A, you don’t need to say to someone you’re praying for their healing for God to be able to work, God’s bigger than that. And B, it really shuts down the conversation.

“I now actually only let a very few people pray for my healing, because I’ve had so many really awful experiences.”

The most hurtful thing, she says, was when someone prayed for her “addiction to negative thinking”.

“I’m not addicted to negative thinking, I’m depressed and anxious medically,” she says.

“It’s a chemical thing going on with me, it’s not an addiction. And that was really unhelpful. I felt very unsettled by that.

“They’re trying to be helpful, but they’re not listening. And inclusion and welcome in Church is about so much more than accessibility physically.”

Many disabled people experience unwanted prayers, often in the street or on public transport. Even the Archbishop has been offered prayers.

“I’ve had times when people have said, ‘Could we pray for you?’ And if I wasn’t the Archbishop I’d have actually said, ‘I’d really prefer that you didn’t’.

“But I feel that I can’t always say that.”

But does he include his own children’s disabilities in his prayers?

He says he prays for Katharine and her mental health on a daily basis, but for Ellie it is more nuanced.

“I haven’t prayed for Ellie,” he says.

“I haven’t talked to Ellie about this [but] we had this discussion once around the [family] table when Ellie wasn’t there, because someone had asked me the question.”

He asked the family what they thought about praying for Ellie.

Turning to Ellie, he says: “Your younger sister said, ‘If God changed Ellie she wouldn’t be Ellie, and we love Ellie’. So there’s that thing that Ellie’s Ellie, she’s precious.”

He sees Katharine’s mental illness as something she’s not always had, but Ellie has always had the disability and it’s part of her.

Ellie, herself, is ambivalent about disability and prayer.

“I have felt a bit like, well if God heals why am I still dyspraxic? Why do I still find it really difficult to do things? But at the same time it doesn’t change the way I trust God.”

Justin reveals that he needs to compile a list of “awkward questions” to ask God “when I meet Him”.

And while he’s at it, perhaps he might try to persuade God to watch the sitcom Mrs Brown’s Boys, which the Archbishop says he watches and is a “good way of unwinding”.

Justin is conscious the Church needs to be aware of, and embrace, people’s differences and needs.

Katharine, who also has chronic fatigue syndrome, says she has felt embarrassed at times when she has been unable to stand during services.

“You can feel quite uncomfortable, like people are looking at you, like you’re not paying attention or not engaging properly.”

She says more flexibility and acceptance is needed. “If someone goes in and the first week they’re there they get tutted at, then they’re not going to come back.”

More parishes have started to use the phrase “stand if it’s convenient”, Justin says, because, when it comes down to it, “it doesn’t matter tuppence” how someone worships.

“You do have to go through a process of educating people,” he says. “Get rid of the frowns and the tuts.”

Justin hopes to find more solutions to these problems when he hosts a conference in July at Lambeth Palace on disability and inclusion.

Image copyright Getty Images

One question he really wants to address is the physical accessibility of churches.

Many of the Church of England’s 9,000 buildings are ill-equipped and inaccessible, but heritage protection currently trumps accessibility law.

“I find it absolutely extraordinary that disability access comes second to heritage,” he says. “I really find that bizarre. Well, that’s one way of saying we don’t care about you, isn’t it?”

Ahead of the conference he has another important event – the christening of Prince Louis on 9 July, which he says is “very nerve wracking” but “a great privilege”.

“You know, if you’re at the wedding don’t drop the rings and if you’re at the baptism don’t drop the baby. They’re a wonderful family, there’s lots of love and it’ll be a great occasion.”

For more Disability News, follow BBC Ouch on Twitter and Facebook, and subscribe to the weekly podcast.

Read more: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/disability-44688094

Nazi Childrens Books, KKK Onesies Are for Sale on Amazon

Despite its own policies against hateful content, Amazon still sells racist productssome of them marketed at children, a new study finds.

Baby onesies featuring a burning cross, swastika necklaces, and costumes depicting a black man being lynched have all found a recent home on Amazon, according to a new study by the Action Center on Race and the Economy and the Partnership for Working Families. The study also found a trove of white supremacist literature that has been created on Amazons publishing platform. Those products lingered on the site despite Amazons policy prohibiting products that promote or glorify hatred, violence, racial, sexual or religious intolerance or promote organizations with such views, the company states on its website.

Amazon, which takes a cut of sales, often doesnt take action against the products unless facing public backlash, the study found. While some of the products cited in the study have since been removed from Amazon, others remain for sale on the site.

Third party sellers who use our Marketplace service must follow our guidelines and those who dont are subject to swift action including potential removal of their account, an Amazon spokesperson told The Daily Beast of the study.

Retailers arent exactly hiding their Nazi products. A leather WWII German Waffen SS replica hat was allowed on the site, despite it being modeled after Nazi uniforms, the study found. The same goes for a swastika necklace, Nazi swords, and paraphernalia with the Totenkopf, a Nazi skull logo that has since been adopted by violent neo-Nazi groups.

A number of those products were marketed at children, including a series of custom Legos modified to look like Nazi troops, and a for girls backpack featuring Pepe, a cartoon frog that has become a symbol of the far right. The Pepe on the girls backpack is wearing a Nazi SS cap. Other Pepe products flagged in the study include a Pepe-fied Donald Trump childrens backpack and a baby romper featuring Pepe in a turban and thick beard for an anti-Muslim variant on the meme. Baby rompers featuring burning crosses, images often associated with the Ku Klux Klan, were also available.

Amazon also hosts neo-Nazi childrens literature. The study found Amazon selling physical and Kindle versions of The Fable of the Ducks and the Hens, a childrens book by George Lincoln Rockwell, the late founder of the American Nazi Party.

The description on Amazons site makes no mention of Rockwells background or the racist propaganda in the book, the study reads. Parents considering the book would see it described as a witty, colorfully illustrated story about ducks whose lives are ruined by an influx of pushy, scheming hens. Those taking a closer look might notice a user review approvingly describing the book as a Great National Socialist Kids book that teaches our children to be careful and dont let refugees into your country and illustrates how we are screwed by the colored birds!

Rockwells name should, in theory, be easy to screen for. One of Americas most prominent Nazis, Rockwell is frequently name-checked by prominent racists including former Ku Klux Klan leader David Duke. His childrens book even appears in full on the American Nazi Partys website.

Amazon isnt just selling white supremacist literature. Its also giving racists the tools to create those texts through CreateSpace, a self-publishing platform.

At least seven SPLC-identified hate groups are publishing materials in Amazon Kindle format as of June 2018, per a review of Amazons site, the study found, referring to the Southern Poverty Law Center. The white nationalist publishing house Counter-Currents has 50 titles available in Kindle format.

Other white supremacist books include a bloodthirsty white nationalist fantasy novel from Kyle Bristow, a lawyer who previously represented white nationalist Richard Spencer, and 18 books by the neo-Nazi Billy Roper. One of his books advertises tips on how to become an influential figure in the white supremacist movement.

Amazons music-streaming services also host white power or hatecore bands. Although some of those bands have slightly modified their song titles to appear more Amazon-friendly (one song title cited in the study was modified from Die Jew Die to Die Die), the artists go under their real band names, which are known for hatecore music. A hatecore record label that owns the website whitepower.com maintain[s] an entire storefront on Amazon up for sale.

Amazon sometimes removes content that violates its hateful product policies. But often the company only does so after facing serious backlash, the study found. In 2015, following a Washington Post expos, Amazon booted a hate group off an Amazon-run fundraising service. The SPLC later noted that it had been trying to oust that same group from the service for years, but that it had no luck until the Post went public with the story.

Amazon has been reactive, not proactive, in its response to use of its site by peddlers of hate, the study found. Amazon has a history of responding slowlyor not at allto public pressure on this front rather than effectively preventing hate groups from using its platforms in the first place.

Read more: https://www.thedailybeast.com/nazi-childrens-books-kkk-onesies-are-for-sale-on-amazon

Vet Reveals The Craziest Things Pet Owners Have Done, And Its Hard To Believe They Have Actually Happened

Visits to the vet can be scary and stressful for the animals, often leaving them drugged and confused. And while we might think that they look quite funny afterward, narrow-eyed expressions aren’t the only humorous things to come out of vet visits. There’s another side of the story, and Imgur user Ali is here to share it.

The 26-year-old woman has been working as a veterinary technician for 3 years and has seen plenty of animals, collecting various stories and incidents through the years. The woman says she enjoys her work, including the surprises and hardships that come with it. “I do enjoy the challenges, just so happened that I had to trap a feral cat that escaped from its cage first thing when I walked in this morning. Took about 45 minutes” Ali told Bored Panda. With plenty of funny and strange stories under her belt, yesterday Ali decided to share a few of them with the world. So scroll down below to read those stories and don’t forget to comment and vote on your favorites!

Young woman books an emergency appointment for a cat. We ask why she’s here, she tells us that she recently adopted this cat from a shelter a few days ago with all his paperwork, showing that he’s clean as a whistle. Fine, so what’s the problem? “Well, I think he may have a lung infection, he sometimes makes a funny sound and it’s happening more often. Usually it’s triggered when…

Young woman books an emergency appointment for a cat. We ask why she’s here, she tells us that she recently adopted this cat from a shelter a few days ago with all his paperwork, showing that he’s clean as a whistle. Fine, so what’s the problem? “Well, I think he may have a lung infection, he sometimes makes a funny sound and it’s happening more often. Usually it’s triggered when he’s near me or when I touch him, but he’ll sometimes just do it around the house”. While the vet is checking out the cat’s lungs I’m holding the cat and gently scratching behind the ears. He starts to purr. A deep loud hearty sound that fills the room. “THAT’S IT THAT’S THE SOUND!” We’re momentarily stunned, eventually the vet manages to reply “Wut? Uhhh….seriously? That’s a purr. He’s happy, if that’s it you can go home.” She’s still confused, but relieved and I give her a bunch of cat pamphlets and stuff and send her on her way. She was sweet as pie and about as smart as one too. That’s okay, she thought something was wrong and came rushing in.

Love them dearly, but dogs can be morons sometimes. So a Golden Retriever (shocking) came in with symptoms like lethargy, excessive drooling, vomiting, not eating (uh oh, it’s a Golden, something up here), and distended belly. We x-ray the patient and his stomach and part of his intestines are completely distended, like balloon huge, and filled with we’re not sure yet. Table time. These surgeries are generally not short, but…

Love them dearly, but dogs can be morons sometimes. So a Golden Retriever (shocking) came in with symptoms like lethargy, excessive drooling, vomiting, not eating (uh oh, it’s a Golden, something up here), and distended belly. We x-ray the patient and his stomach and part of his intestines are completely distended, like balloon huge, and filled with we’re not sure yet. Table time. These surgeries are generally not short, but this guy took the prize. 4 hours later, we removed 6 and a half socks and 3 large dishtowels. The surgery looked more like the magic trick with the scarves up the sleeves than the trick itself. It never ended. We were dying of laughter, but holy shit. The dog is fine now. Hopefully no longer scarfing laundry. Sorry not sorry.

Nipples baffle the sh*t out of pet owner’s new and old alike. It happens so frequently that it’s a joke now. “Oh my god I found some lumps on their belly!” So for everyone’s awareness cats and dogs alike have six to eight nips along their belly and it’s okay guys. Sometimes the boys flash them too. Sometimes girls and boys alike don’t. The best was the big burly guy…

Nipples baffle the sh*t out of pet owner’s new and old alike. It happens so frequently that it’s a joke now. “Oh my god I found some lumps on their belly!” So for everyone’s awareness cats and dogs alike have six to eight nips along their belly and it’s okay guys. Sometimes the boys flash them too. Sometimes girls and boys alike don’t. The best was the big burly guy and his Mastiff and he would simply not accept that his MALE dog had nipples. Wanted to get them removed under anesthesia even after explaining to him that they’re normal. It was funny, but he was a bit intense. Nice dog though.

This one has happened twice now, and holy sh*t is it funny. Usually it happens while their grooming or if they’re horny and decide to hump a blanket or something, and anyway their little red rocket makes a surprise appearance. Apparently if you do not know this, it’s f**king shocking and terrifying. “What is that”, “It doesn’t look normal” “HIS PENIS IS BLEEDING WHAT IS HAPPENING” “But I thought you…

This one has happened twice now, and holy sh*t is it funny. Usually it happens while their grooming or if they’re horny and decide to hump a blanket or something, and anyway their little red rocket makes a surprise appearance. Apparently if you do not know this, it’s f**king shocking and terrifying. “What is that”, “It doesn’t look normal” “HIS PENIS IS BLEEDING WHAT IS HAPPENING” “But I thought you cut it off when he got fixed”. For real though.

This one is kind of sad and weird. One of our clients is losing their mind a little bit, and they have a small dog. Well she brings the dog in all the time because the owner is convinced that her neighbors (shadowy figures with no face) are futzing around with her dog’s penis while she’s gone and that the dog has severe anxiety from it. The dog is fine…

This one is kind of sad and weird. One of our clients is losing their mind a little bit, and they have a small dog. Well she brings the dog in all the time because the owner is convinced that her neighbors (shadowy figures with no face) are futzing around with her dog’s penis while she’s gone and that the dog has severe anxiety from it. The dog is fine and is really sweet, but oh my god.

Kids mean well, but goddammit guys where are you grabbing them? I understand when they have broken wings and sh*t but the number of times they just walk in with a bird and are like “Hey look what I got, do something with it” and just leave is weird. The notable and exciting day for everyone was when some kids nabbed a bird, brought it to us and it happened…

Kids mean well, but goddammit guys where are you grabbing them? I understand when they have broken wings and sh*t but the number of times they just walk in with a bird and are like “Hey look what I got, do something with it” and just leave is weird. The notable and exciting day for everyone was when some kids nabbed a bird, brought it to us and it happened to be tagged by a local pigeon racing group (they exist?). Some old dudes in a truck showed up about 4 hours later all excited like little girls. It’s apparently the farthest one of their birds has been tracked flying. There was also a budgie once brought in by the bird children, it got adopted.

Bless them, there are these rescue organizations that either seize or purchase food market dogs and get them adopted out overseas to live out “normal lives”. Now don’t get me wrong they do A LOT of good work and many of the animals are genuinely saved. Some are so deeply broken that they cannot function as a pet in any sense. This dog HATEd to get touched by literally anybody,…

Bless them, there are these rescue organizations that either seize or purchase food market dogs and get them adopted out overseas to live out “normal lives”. Now don’t get me wrong they do A LOT of good work and many of the animals are genuinely saved. Some are so deeply broken that they cannot function as a pet in any sense. This dog HATEd to get touched by literally anybody, it was extremely flighty and bitey, genuinely aggressive towards most people, and it came in to get vaccinated. That’s it. Okay…fine. So we hand the owner a muzzle and that’s when the guy goes “Oh no, I can’t put that on her”. She’s a snarling drooling mess the entire time we’re in there, positioned in way that she’s ready to lunge at us at a moments notice. She’s the size of a Shepherd, probably somekind of Akita mix thing, whatever. Anyway that’s when the guy tells us that “he’s scared to” because she once bit him so in the face that he had a hole in his palate into his f**king sinuses. He had to have reconstructive surgery. Dumbfounded it took a moment to tell the guy that he needs to go home, there was no f**king way. It’s the only time we’ve ever done that.

Read more: http://www.boredpanda.com/stories-of-veterinary-technician-animals-tankgirl215/

19 Movies From Your Childhood You Should Watch at Your Next Family Movie Night

Every generation is nostalgic for the movies of their childhood.

But the movies of our childhood, and by our childhood I mean the ’80s and ’90s, are objectively the best. It’s just a fact.

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Read more: http://twentytwowords.com/movies-from-your-childhood-you-should-watch-at-your-next-family-movie-night/